Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Interruptions


Do you ever interrupt someone in a conversation? Please say yes, because I don't want to be alone.

If you've ever had a conversation with me, you might know that I interrupt at times, especially if it's something I feel passionate about - can be either positive or negative.


Sometimes the interruption is like an unannounced volcano, the words jump out before I realize they are even forming, which means I've forgotten all the instructions I've ever given myself about thinking before I talk.
Some times, my tongue bleeds. It's a good thing, if the other person is finished talking and my bloody tongue is still under control. It means I bit well and didn't interrupt. But at times the biting is too hard and the slow-churning volcano spills over, spewing words where they don't belong.

Every time I do it, I get really annoyed at myself. And I promise myself I won't do it again. Never, ever again!!

If I realize I interrupted, I apologize to the person promptly and hope that my apologize will give them memory loss. (won't that be nice) Most times, the person is gracious and says no big deal and the conversation continues as normal, with my tongue now severely bridled. (hopefully) Other times, the interruption has messed with the other person or the moment to the point that the conversation fizzles out soon after. Hate when that happens!

Then there are times, I'm replaying a conversation in my mind later - might be hours or days later - and I realize I interrupted. Ugh! Then I begin a conversation with God about whether or not, I should take a few steps backward and talk to the person about it. Sometimes my answer is clear and I act on it. Some days, everything within me is saying I need to address it, but I don't want to. I argue with myself.
I needed to get my point across and how was I supposed to when 'they' didn't give me an open!
Janet, this needs an apologize - do it!
But ... but ... but ....

The good news for this ugly part of me is that when I recognize my interruptions and ask God to forgive me, he does. And according to what I've read, he does have memory loss about it - yes!

If I'm lucky, the other person will forgive me also and our relationship will continue as before.

I've never interrupted in the public way that Kanye West did on the VMA awards - but after seeing him on Leno last night, I assume he's feeling some of the same things I do after I interrupt.

His apologize was not perfect. It was awkward.

Walking in, he appeared very nervous and anxious. To tell you the truth, I was concerned what was in the rolled-up coat he carried in. And the ideas that went through my mind were not kind and showed me how much I've judged him. I felt stupid when I realized it was only a coat that he then wore to sing.

Kanye seemed at a loss and didn't know what to say, when Leno asked him what his late mother would think of this situation. That question seemed almost cruel to me - not sure that it was kind or necessary.

But Kanye's interruption, Leno's questions and the awkward apologize - none of that is mine to control or judge. What am I to do?

Forgive.

Pray for wisdom for everyone involved.

And thank God for classy women like Beyonce that can teach us all something about taking the high road. (now, if she would just find some pants for some of her outfits)

3 comments:

Cioara Andrei said...

Foarte interesat subiectul postat de tine, m-am uitat pe blogul tau si imi place ce am vazu am sa mai revin cu siguranta.
O zi buna!

Anonymous said...

Good article I think Kanye would appreciate it. I guess I have a caring heart for Kanye because I saw an interview with his mother on or right after her sudden death. He was a very caring son. He has a heart that can be refined(thank you, Jesus). So yes, the question by Jay Leno was on purpose, he probably saw the same interview, he may have even done the interview!?! Wasn't Kanye's reply to take time off and work on his stuff, maybe murmered?
I'll admit, I interupt, I lose my temper and say this off the tip of my tongue, it happens. Wish it wouldn't. That's some of my refining that needs to come (thank you, Jesus).
Good thoughts.

Janet Oberholtzer said...

Thanks for your thoughts Anon and yes, Kanye did say he needed to take some time off and think through what kind of person he is and wants to be. That's an excellent plan - stopping to think about yourself and life, along with asking and allowing God to help, is usually what leads to changed behavior.