Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Suddenly ...

Suddenly ...
My day and my world changes.
What I planned to do changes because of what I must do.
Reading a text from my son's friend changes the day and more.

Suddenly ...
The run I expected to go on doesn't happen.
I pick up my husband, instead of changing into running clothes.
Instead of running, I'm driving to a hospital - praying.

Suddenly ...
I find myself panicking at what all could be wrong.
The message from his snowboarding buddy replays in my mind.
Joe landed hard on his right side - couldn't breathe at first.

Suddenly ...
I recall him saying that Joe walked over to the first aid building.
And I breathe easier thinking of cracked ribs and bruises.
Instead of him being paralyzed or worse.

Suddenly ...
The chaplain takes us to a small room.
The doctor enters the room with a concerned face.
With words that sound odd to me, "Your son is a very sick boy."

Suddenly ...
I realize this will not be as good as I've convinced myself it will.
I hear words from the doctor - bleeding, kidney, life-threatening!
I scream quietly to God for help - give me strength and peace!

Suddenly ...
I feel a measure of peace - it comes from deep within.
I breathe deep a few times - oxygen is good for me.
I wipe tears away and force myself to hear the ugly words.

Suddenly ...
I am calm again. I can talk. "What can you do to help Joe?"
Surgery, cat scan, blood transfusions - the words continue.
"We'll save the kidney if we can. But if bleeding persists, we'll have to remove it."

Suddenly ...
The doctor leaves. I'm glad. I heard all the words I can handle.
Plus I want him to be with Joe. Joe needs him.
And Joe needs a mom with enough peace that she can pray - for him and for the doctors.

Suddenly ...
I feel that peace - the peace I recognize that is not my own.
It's not something I can manufacture or motivate myself.
It's peace from my creator - the maker and giver of peace, even when I'm terrified.

As I pray I realize the "peace that passes understanding" is strong enough to hold me this moment even though I don't know what the outcome of this "suddenly" in our world will be.

This post is part of the Blog Carnival - Peace - hosted by Bridget Chumbley over at One Word at a Time.
 
PSS. New readers - my son Joe was injured on Sat. Jan. 16, 2010. He is at home now recovering from having his right kidney removed because it was split in half from the impact. He is expected to make a full recovery. I posted updates about his injury and hospital stay, starting here. Here's a recap post.

14 comments:

S. Etole said...

yes ... I know ... you captured it well

jasonS said...

Amen. Thanks, Janet.

Anonymous said...

Powerful words and emotions!

Thanks for sharing this, Janet. I'm so glad your boy is doing so much better!

Russell Holloway said...

Peace to you ... thanks again ... :-)

Maureen said...

May peace be with you and may your son heal fully and quickly.

Anonymous said...

i am glad that you used your recent experience to tell us of the peace that you were given when you needed it.

Connie Arnold said...

At times like this, it's only that "peace that passes understanding" that can help us get through intact. Thank you for sharing this inspiring experience!

Rindy Walton said...

Wow. Made it to your site via @mbstockdale I can so relate to what you've just gone through--the same day, Jan 16th, my 14 yr old son was playing hockey & hit the post full speed head-on...then didn't move. I went through some of the same feelings as he was rushed to a trauma center & I was surrounded by every dr imaginable (and with a medical background understanding all they were saying). He suffered a severe concussion...inches from breaking his neck & just bought a top of the line concussion-prevent helmet the night before. To think of what may have been overwhelms me. His recovery is going to take time--and praying full recovery will take place. The peace that happened in his time in the hospital, along with his recovery so far, can only be through God. Praying your son heals quickly too...

Glynn said...

We weren't there physically, but we were all there, and praying. Your willingness to share what your heart was wrenching through for your son made it evident that God's people needed to respond. And we still do.

Kathleen Overby said...

It is so good to hear you say we don't manufacture or
create our own peace, it is given to us. The good ending is a blessing. Thx.

Heather Sunseri said...

Oh, Janet. I'm so thankful to God that He is always there to give us peace exactly when we need it. And I'm thankful that you were able to find peace in order to be strong and faithful for your son. I, too, am praying for his speedy recovery.

Louise Gallagher said...

I cried as I read this, and then my tears turned to peace as I followed your journey.

thank you for sharing this.

JoAnne said...

From the day, our children are born, we sure learn about the comforting peace that comes from God, but is tucked somewhere deep inside as parents. I am so glad to hear your son is doing better Janet; what a frightening experience!

Janet Oberholtzer said...

Thank you all for your kind words and prayers! God's peace carried me that first night/day. And since then (as some doubts and questions came) the love and support of friends (online and in real life) has helped me continue to take one minute at a time and allow peace to guide me.